Mary is a teenage girl living in Nazareth in the year 1 B.C. (but speaking in modern dialogue). She's a normal teen: horny, mean to her mom, and thirsty for fame. It's fun being the hottest 15-year-old in town until you get knocked up by a married shepherd and might get STONED to death for adultery! When their town runs out of people to stone and is on the hunt for sinners, Mary and her gay best friend Joseph (who's hooking up with a Roman soldier) find themselves totally endangered. They hatch a plan to save their lives in this cuckoo patriarchal town. How? They'll convince everybody that GOD made Mary pregnant... with the new Messiah. And that they've been chosen to raise Him.